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They tell me I’m going to Los Angeles, California—this time for good. I have no reason not to believe them. I have been going to LA at least two or three times a year for five years and have liked it for its apocalyptic nightmarishness as well as for its nightmarish apocalypseness. It is a strange and dark place and you can drive all over it and find big and weird things wherever you end up.

I have slept inside various cars all over the city of Los Angeles for good and bad reasons, but soon I will sleep inside an apartment on a semi-permanent basis.

I am going to buy black-out curtains and hide from the sun. Maybe I’ll never go outside during the day unless I have to. LA is real cool at night anyway. I’ll have a lot more fun round about midnight, just like I do everywhere, except I’ll have the beach at my disposal again. Nighttime beach is the best beach. I have wandered LA beaches at night and have felt perfectly fine. I plan to do a whole lot of that.

I will visit the Griffith Park observatory as often as possible. l will sleep on the floor, on a Japanese futon, and make as few facial expressions as possible. I will eat delicious food and never answer my phone. I will feel weird all the time. I will stare at the wind-leant palms, and so on.

YeAhAHhhh come visit me!!!

HEADS UP Y’ALL: Anyone who refers to themselves as a “raconteur” is not welcome in my home!!

Thank you. Good-night.

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Tracey came to visit me and it rained the whole time

(Photo taken by a random woman who was standing on the Burnside Bridge)

Man. If I could go back right now as-is and live my little Baltimore life again, I would. SURE.

So we’re all in agreement that perfect symmetry in a human body is creepy as hell, right? I mean, how could it not be? There’s something unnerving about it!

Isn’t it way cooler when someone has mostly straight teeth but then they have like one weird crooked tooth? Or, even better, a bunch of crooked teeth? I find that so touching.

DID YOU KNOW: My right eye is slightly higher up than my left eye? I think that rules. I also have a “beauty mark” (lol) on my left cheek that I absolutely hated when I was kid. But now I love that thing a whole bunch.

OK your turn!!

Laura sent me this! It’s a street in San Francisco. I have driven down it many times~~ ☆ミ

HEY.

Have y’all seen ‘Mad Mad: Fury Road’? Whoa baby. That is definitely one of my favorite movies ever. It is so hot and so tasty I can hardly stand it.

. . . did y’all know it was originally supposed to be shot in black and white? Yeah. But George Miller’s backers weren’t into it, so they went with that oversaturated look, which rules.

. . . except, holy hell, black and white would be so god darn cool I want to scream until I throw up.

Well guess what, punks: it’s coming out September 29th in black and white. It’s going to rule hard. I am going to try to find a theater that is playing it because I want to plunk down and get jacked hecka hard by that movie. I am ready to let it destroy me.

OK!

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Philp K. Dick is buried next to his twin sister, who died at six weeks old (on my birthday). Whoa.

There is a cat on that tombstone.

Y’all can do whatever you like, but for the most part I still think boning is for simps and posers (lol)