So as long as a few things line up in the next 30 days, I’ll be back in the Bay Area in about as much time. My friend Brandon is helping me get a job, and he told me: “Just don’t make that cover letter too weird!”

And I said: “Am I the sort of person who seems like they would write a weird cover letter?”

And he said: “Yeah!”

It’s a good thing he told me that, because I’m pretty sure I was going to default to making that cover letter weird! I’m willing to bet that’s why I’ve missed out on a bunch of jobs I’ve applied for over the course of my sad dumb life.

I’m gonna crank it down a little!

You gotta, you know, be yourself or whatever—but not too much yourself! Hell, they don’t want that, and maybe I don’t blame them either.

Heck, dude. I’m so pumped. If it falls through I’m going down to Los Angeles. I got some stuff lined up there as a sort of plan B. I reckon I’ll end up in LA sooner or later, but the reason I’m choosing the Bay Area this time around is because that’s where all my friends are. If I were old and rich, or poor and totally fucked out forever, I’d for sure be going to LA right now . . . or maybe Antarctica. But no! The Bay Area it is.

That place kinda sucks in the same way every place kinda sucks, but man, I sure do like it a whole lot.

OK! Back to work!