I am twenty-seven years old and have resisted steady work, meaningful uhhh “intimate” relationships, and any real stability because the other thing looked much worse. The conclusion that I guess I’m finally putting into words is that no matter how you live it, it is difficult and it hurts like hell and it is sort of creepy a lot of the time.

In other words: it don’t matter what kind of Halloween costume you got on, ’cause baby, it all blends into some weird grey feeling anyway. For each and every one of us, no matter what. Yeah.

Thank god we have animals. Oh boy! I’d really lose it if we didn’t have them.

My grandfather, who I never met, has part of a poem by A.E. Housman on his tombstone. It says just about everything there is to say when you really get down to it:

Into my heart an air that kills
From yon far country blows:
What are those blue remembered hills,
What spires, what farms are those?

That is the land of lost content,
I see it shining plain,
The happy highways where I went
And cannot come again.

A human being without the proper empathy or feeling is the same as an android built so as to lack it, either by design or mistake. We mean, basically, someone who does not care about the fate which his fellow living creatures fall victim to; he stands detached, a spectator, acting out by his indifference John Donne’s theorem that “No man is an island,” but giving that theorem a twist: that which is a mental and a moral island is not a man.

Yeah, whoa

Yeah.

Philip K. Dick, yeah, yeah man

You know that awful feeling you have when you re-watch a movie you used to love and it turns out the movie is actually incredibly bad

Man, that’s how I feel about a whole bunch of stuff right now

Today I have listened to all of Brian Eno’s ambient albums several times. Today I cannot bear words! No! Can’t do it!

“hail nothing full of nothing, nothing is with thee”

cooldudelol

Laura took this last week on the bridge by the Emeryville train station. I sent it to my father and he said: “Son, it looks like you’re in jail.”

And I said, “Yeah baby, it’s called Planet Earth!!!”