He is still alive, and somewhere wearily goes up and down the stairs of strange houses, stares somewhere at clean-scoured parquet floors and carefully tended araucarias, sits for days in libraries and nights in taverns, or lying on a hired sofa, listens to the world beneath his window and the hum of human life from which he knows that he is excluded. But he has not killed himself, for a glimmer of belief still tells him that he is to drink this frightful suffering in his heart to the dregs, and that it is of this suffering he must die.

yes

thank god The Designer(s) made boning / reproducing so easy and straightforward, because if you needed an instruction manual to make babies there would probably be 6.8 billion less people on this planet

oh wait maybe that would be a good thing!!!!

my dad told me one time that just about the meanest thing you can do to someone is to give their phone number to an army recruiter

maintenance, lovelessness, diminishing returns

. . . He read the label on my bottle and asked whether I would not drink some wine. When I declined his offer and said that I never drank it, the old helpless expression came over his face.

“You’re quite right there,” he said. “I have practised abstinence myself for years, and had my time of fasting, too, but now I find myself once more beneath the sign of Aquarius, a dark and humid constellation.”

On one other occasion I saw him in this lady’s company. It was in one of the streets of the town. They were arm in arm and he looked very happy; and again I wondered to see how much charm—what an even childlike expression—his care-ridden face had sometimes. It explained the young lady to me, also the predilection my aunt had for him. That day, too, however, he came back in the evening, sad, and wretched as usual. I met him at the door and under his cloak, as many times before, he had the bottle of Italian wine, and he sat with it half the night in his hell upstairs. It grieved me. What a comfortless, what a forlorn and shiftless life he led!

Dude yesssSSSSSS

I know that I’m going to sound like a crotchety old man here, but can I just say that I don’t like those 2–5 second looping videos that appear everywhere on the internet

You know, they play forwards and then backwards, the same 2–5 seconds, on and on forever

I reckon I’ve just never seen a good one, and even then I don’t really understand the appeal to begin with

How could anything interesting be contained within such a short and tiny medium!!!!!!!

Last night I crawled into my sleeping bag and put on a sleep mask and some earplugs and popped a melatonin tablet.

In my final moments of consciousness I realized I had already taken a melatonin a half hour before. I groaned! I was gonna be double-tonin’ all night.

Well: I slept very well, and had many vivid and interesting dreams. But because I had descended deep down into such a pleasant dreamhole, my body didn’t want to come out of it.

I woke up at 4:30 p.m. The sun had set ten minutes before!

I have not and will not see the sun today!

Whoa!!!

Winter, huh!

. . . he had created within himself with positive genius a boundless and frightful capacity for pain. I saw at the same time that the root of his pessimism was not world-contempt but self-contempt; for however mercilessly he might annihilate institutions and persons in his talk he never spared himself. It was always at himself first and foremost that he aimed the shaft, himself first and foremost whom he hated and despised.

. . . for the love of his neighbor was as deeply in him as the hatred for himself, and so his whole life was an example that love of one’s neighbor is not possible without love of oneself, and that self-hate is really the same thing as sheer egoism, and in the long run breeds the same cruel isolation and despair.

He was just as irregular and irresponsible about his meal times as he was about his hours of sleep and work. There were days when he did not go out at all and had nothing but his coffee in the morning. Sometimes my aunt found nothing but a banana peel to show that he had dined.

whoa

yeah

man, of all the people in my family— my mother and father, my siblings, my aunts and uncles and cousins and so on— i really do have the weirdest dumbest and quantifiably (lol) worst life of any of them

i mean i could actually really use math to prove it

whoops!!

dante got a cat tree