just now, for maybe the thousandth time in my life, i addressed the ceiling, saying: "o sweet and merciful lord above, please hurry up and kill me already"

bison skulls

um

nothing i didn’t already know but uh . . . yeah this sucks lol

RACING THOUGHTS / SLOWNESS IN ACTIVITY

hey: at least the euphoria part is pretty cool

too about all the rest of it

no cure

yeah baby

let’s (keep on) do(ing) this!!!

i had kerwin take these at berkeley bowl yesterday to send to My Good Buddy in Another State

and now, without his permission, i am reposting them here for posterity

woooo hey is anyone else tired of ruining their lives piece by piece because of erratic and toxic compulsions??

RECENT DANTE (AUG. 2017):

I paid for my coffee and grappa and I watched the people going by in the light from the window. I saw Catherine and knocked on the window. She looked, saw me and smiled, and I went out to meet her. She was wearing a dark blue cape and a soft felt hat. We walked along together, along the sidewalk past the wine shops, then across the market square and up the street and through the archway to the cathedral square. There were streetcar tracks and beyond them was the cathedral. It was white and wet in the mist. We crossed the tram tracks. On our left were the shops, their windows lighted, and the entrance to the galleria. There was a fog in the square and when we came close to the front of the cathedral it was very big and the stone was wet.

“Would you like to go in?”

“No,” Catherine said. We walked along. There was a soldier standing with his girl in the shadow of one of the stone buttresses ahead of us and we passed them. They were standing tight up against the stone and he had put his cape around her.

“They’re like us,” I said.

“Nobody is like us,” Catherine said.

‘a farewell to arms’

one of the best ones

or at any rate: i love it a whole lot

i’ve watched it twice in the last two weeks

robert altman! you gorgeous son of a bitch

CURRENT LIST (AUG. 2017) OF AFFECTIONATE NICKNAMES GIVEN TO ME BY MY BEAUTIFUL FRIENDS:

• “rybaby”
• “rybabe”
• “baby star”
• “starbaby”
• “mr. starkrisp”
• “baby shoes”
• “vampbaby”
• “teen wolf”
• “soft shoe”
• “king baby”
• “warrior star”
• “shoelace strangler”
• “cop car”
• “scrub board”
• “hot brick”
• “muffin”
• “li’l rocket”

thanx bye