portland

i’m back from portland. it wasn’t so bad. i went there to see my friends and to escape the wildfire smoke in oakland. i got back early this morning and the smoke seems a little better. i don’t know man. whatever

anyway: i’m selling a lot of my stuff. i’m selling my car and i think both of my computers. hmmm. i think i’m going to sell or give away pretty much everything in my closet too

if you’ve ever been in my room, just close your eyes and visualize it. what do you want?? just email me or something and you can have it

i’ll post pictures soon~

ok~~

this picture is now public domain

(pictures stolen from my friends)

i got into portland last night and met my friends at this shithole called chopsticks. it was cheap and good. my friend marguerite and i swapped denim jackets for five whole minutes and i ended up looking like vegas elvis.

matt turned ghost-white and collapsed in the parking lot as we were leaving and monty and i broke his fall. he had some sort of seizure for reasons i can’t get into. he’s totally fine now. he came to very quickly . . . but it was real scary!

we slept in our rental car next to lone fir cemetery. now we’re going to tom’s diner to get breakfast~

it’s a place where you can touch the truth of the universe.

going there may bring sorrow.

i’ll tell ya sometimes when i take a look at ya i keep a-lookin and a-lookin

i wanna feel your little body against me so bad i think i’m gonna bust

i keep tryin to tell ya in a lot of different ways

well i tell ya somethin i got poetry in me

i do! i got poetry in me

but i ain’t gonna put it down on paper

i ain’t no educated man

i got sense enough not to try it!

the sea of eden is filled with ultimate intelligence.
you can’t go there unless you’re truly ready.
it’s a place where you can touch the truth of the universe.
going there may bring sorrow.

ryan, you’ve stood on the eight power spots of the earth.
from these, you created magicant, the realm of your mind.
in magicant, there’s beauty, kindness, sorrow, and hatred.
of course, there’s an evil and violent side of you.
the sea of eden sits at the center of those feelings.
it takes you to the truth about yourself.

i still feel pain where you wounded me.

(i’m just a faint memory. you don’t usually remember me.
but you’ve heard my song in the back of your mind.)

look at the sun.
face the sun and smile . . .