Gritt, eyes closed in deep meditation, inhaled every last ghostly molecule like the old master he was.

“What is a flag?” said Gritt moodily. His eyes were still closed. “A symbol of popular lies, I reckon.” He lifted his leathery eyelids halfway. He gazed into the nothing he saw before him. “Woulda died fer them stars and stripes. Watched a lotta men dew jus that. All the terrible things we man-apes have done ta meat, Shark. All the sins we have committed in the dark. Picassos of carnage, that’s all we is.” Gritt outstretched his arms as if grasping at all of human existence. “And here we are, at the end of all things, imprisoned in this hell we have wrought, imbued with the dreams of our sleepin forebears, and gone mad knowing we have squandered the sum of our collective experiences. Our ancestors crawled on their hands and knees through the horrors of time and space so we could . . . sell a few more cans’uv Coca-Cola. . . .”


“I have gone to dark places and have seen the dark things growing there. I tried ta see the world fer what it was. I tried ta live inside of it. All in vain.” He exhaled deeply. “All in vain.”

my Weekend Roommate is out of town, so emma and i went to the wolfhound and pool sharked everyone, and then watched ANDREI RUBLEV the next night, which i had been meaning to do for like six years


also, OOPS, this was last weekend in berkeley with laura and campbell, my angels:

just in case you were wondering what it’s like to live in a country that borders russia, my friend in estonia told me that she’s learning how to shoot a gun

i’ve had this on my phone forever and it is always a joy to find it again. evergreen content for sure. i guess you might say i’ve thought about willem dafoe thinking about murder many times. what a dude. love that dude

who are you? why do you read this? it’s always so interesting to me. in the ten years i have been updating this website, i’ve gotten so many emails and letters from friendly strangers who then became my friends. i’ve even met some of you in person! hell, just yesterday my good friend in belgium invited me to drive down with her and her family to this beautiful house south of tuscany and stay with them while we’re there this summer?? what???

i love getting emails and letters, so go ahead and


i promise i’ll write you back! i dig y’all. you know?

ok bye!!!

sleep to be in darkness

sleep to stop from thinking

sleep to make time pass