01 June 2015

I have this weird problem where I own four pairs of really great boxer briefs, and six or seven that are pretty bad. I feel off on the days I have to wear the bad ones. Recently I was thinking about it and . . . why aren’t all of my boxer briefs nice? Why do I have these half-assed boxer briefs that impede upon my day and remind of all the worst parts of being human? (Whoa, what?)

And see, my “nice” boxer briefs aren’t even all that expensive. I think they’re something like $5 a pair. They’re made of cotton and man are they great.

Tomorrow is payday. For me, payday means I get a pretty small amount of money. Nonetheless I am going to throw away my stupid bad boxer briefs and buy some nice-ass cotton ones. That way I won’t start the god darn day at a terrible disadvantage.

The end!