“words” / phrases / sentences i am tired of hearing:
- “meh”
- “ownage”
- “sick”
- “rad”
- “stoked”
- “that [totally pedestrian not-epic thing] is so epic”
- “killin it, dude”
- “crushin it, dude”
- “killed it, dude”
- “crushed it, dude”
- “that [blank] is on point, dude”
- “beyonce is my spirit animal”
- “[inanimate object / food item / celebrity] is my spirit animal”
- “[anything] is my spirit animal”
- “netflix and chill”
- “that [blank] is hella tight”
- “that’s trill”
- “[meme reference]”
- “[meme comprised of human scenario a lot of people relate to followed by stock photo / picture of celebrity / scene from a ’90s movie]”
- “bacon is awesome”
- “i just got this t-shirt that has a [cartoon alien head / pentagram / piece of bacon and/or pizza] on it”
- “i prefer IPAs”
- “i think you’re just smoking the wrong strain”
- “that [blank] tho”
- “dat [blank] doe”
- “bae”
- “when bae [something] but u [something else]”
- “when bae [anything]”
- “it’s not humid, it’s like a dry heat”
- “i don’t know, i just prefer iphones”
- “i don’t know, i just prefer androids”
- “[opinion on computer / mobile operating system]”
- “i read on [npr / buzzfeed / slate / huffington post] that [word-for-word regurgitation of article]”
- “oh my god have you seen that youtube video [that has 400 million views]”
- “i don’t know, i just think [opinion on celebrity’s personal life]”
- “[celebrity] would never do that”
- “i think religion is stupid, but “
- “i’m not religious but i am spiritual”
- “isn’t it crazy how we’re all made of starstuff?”
- “it’s like nietzsche said: [something nietzsche said]”
- “are you good at networking?”
- “do you have a linkedin profile?”
- “well it helps if you have a linkedin profile”
- “[opinion on popular television show]”
- “[a room full of people quoting the same movie / television show]”
- “[argument about if the beatles’ were really influential to music]”
- “[conversation about ‘the singularity’]”
- “[conversation about what smoking marijuana is like]”
- “[conversation about tattoos someone wants to get in the future]”
- “[conversation about what ‘hipster’ actually means]”
- “[conversation about politics]”
- “[conversation about dietary restrictions]”
- “[conversation about international situation that everyone heard about on npr and has the same two-sentence depth of knowledge on]”
- “[anything involving sports]”
- “[object / restaurant / coffee shop / abstract concept] is so hipster”
- “[person] is such a hipster”
- “oh i don’t know, i think [awful thing about the 21st century] is way better than [quantifiably superior old way of doing something]”
- “all i’m saying is, you’d better vote for [political candidate no one cared about six months ago]”
- (after hearing you make a joke you yourself came up with) “wait what’s that from again?”
(to be continued (oh no))
(((please note: i don’t necessarily blame people for saying this stuff. it’s just that everyone is being exposed to the same exact things, and so it’s starting to feel like a god darn echo chamber where no one has any original thoughts of their own anymore. i have heard people say almost all of these things verbatim a million times at this point. just say something new!!!)))