i have written about this before (or maybe i haven’t— my life is a screaming vortex of shadowy hallucinations (just kidding (kind of))), BUT:

there is absolutely a certain tone people take with me after a few years, which communicates to me indirectly, “nice talking to you, but there is no room in my life for you anymore, so i guess this is it”

there is a sort of implied finality is what i’m saying

and i’ll be honest: it has happened so many times that there is hardly anyone left