10 October 2013

I don’t know what this is or why I wrote it, but it was definitely me who wrote it:

My favorite horror game is Kingdom Hearts. Nary a moment exists in my nighttime thoughts when I am not haunted by the deep-black images of this loathsome horror-fantasy. You control a floppy-footed little boy with gorgeous hair who wields a large key (keys scare me). Later, we are introduced to a talking mouse aided in his dark sorcery by his googly-eyed clan of miscreants. They are an insidious group of roughnecks, to be sure. A mentally deficient dog and a violent, alcoholic duck round out your so-called “party”, and the three of us explored hallucinogenic worlds glazed in every nightmarish hue of the rainbow. Oh! And up out of the ground come these goop-y creatures with bug eyes! Most frightening of all: they are without hearts! If this isn’t some sort of deep metaphor, I don’t know what is, but surely it scared the wits right out of me. These little horrors attacked my floppy-footed boy, and said downright nasty things to him in squirming, inhuman voices. So I hit them with the enormous key, and what a dreadful task that was. . . . Lord God am I ever shivering, just pondering this memory! I’m afraid I don’t have it in me to describe in detail the dreaded gelatin craft that I was charged with piloting. Such a thing might do this old heart in good (but at least I have one!).

I wish I could remember the context. Maybe there never was any context. Yeah.