this is my tinder profile

does anyone else have a bad feeling about this? by which i mean: do you suppose that it all just continues on like this, changing very little with the exception of your mind and body, which only get worse and worse by orders of magnitude with each passing day???

David Mamet’s ‘HEIST’ (2001) is REAL COOL and A CONSTANT SOURCE OF INSPIRATION TO ME because GIVE ME A BREAK THIS STUFF RULES

oh god this miserable mutant boat ride straight to hell

this sadistic sideshow of utter sadness!!

. . . this flaming freak show on wheels!!

finding and being found by sad people

UPDATE: got it!!!

the bay area is cold every night year-round, which rules

sometimes it gets pretty cold

and so if i go a-roving i’ll take along this scarf i bought (after a girl in portland stole my other scarf and presumably tossed it into a garbage can)

if i Get Too Warm i’ll roll up my scarf and hide it in someone’s yard so i can scoop it up again on my way back

i don’t like carrying things, you see!!

anyway i’m on my way to the corner of dwight and wert in berkeley to do just that— to get my dang (replacement) scarf back

i hid it inside a tree!!!

have you ever noticed that once someone turns 30, they start using phrases like “meaningful connections” and “digital vagabond” in their tinder profiles

lord

kill me if i start doing that because neither of those things mean shit lol

my sister