29 January 2016

. . . because I am a blackguard, because I am the nastiest, stupidest, absurdest and most envious of all the worms on earth, who are not a bit better than I am, but, the devil knows why, are never put to confusion; while I shall always be insulted by every louse, that is my doom!

And, indeed, I will ask on my own account here an idle question: which is better— cheap happiness or exalted sufferings? Well, which is better?

. . . for we are all divorced from life, we are all cripples, every one of us, more or less. We are so divorced from it that we feel at once a sort of loathing for real life, and so we cannot be reminded of it. Why, we have come almost to looking upon real life as an effort, almost as hard work, and we are all privately agreed that it is better in books.

i guess it’s kind of sad that the four characters i identify with most are the underground man from ‘notes from underground,’ ishmael from ‘moby-dick,’ ignatius from ‘a confederacy of dunces,’ and antoine from ‘nausea’

kilgore trout too, if i’m being honest