If you’ve read this godforsaken website for any amount of time, surely you must have picked up on the fact that I’m obsessed with death, specifically my own, just as any fine American should be.
Well: I can’t shake it, man. I really do have this vague unplaceable feeling that I’m reaching the end of my life. It is not necessarily scary or ominous, though maybe a little bit. I dream about it all the time . . . have premonitions and so on. I can’t hear the spirits whispering in the dark or anything like that, not yet anyway, though maybe that’s the next sign that I’m almost at the gates of eternity.
What is this? I got Death in me, that’s for sure. It is on the other side of everything, thank god. But is it sitting on my tail and getting heavier by the day? I wonder. It truly feels that way and I can’t explain it. Maybe you just know it when you’re doomed and when those invisible forces and coming to take you away. If I am soon to perish then let this post serve as some sort of receipt.
I’ve lived a life free of compromise. I am an idiot but nobody ever got me to do anything I didn’t wanna do. I never shilled or sold out or played the game. I won’t call it a victory, but it is something, however insignificant, and I guess it goes right down the drain with me. Tears in rain, et cetera. It’s just as well.
Should the LORD strike me dead sometime soon as I have foreseen, please find a digital copy of my will on my desktop. I’m serious. I’ve been talking about this for years and it’s really there. Thanks for everything. In the face of true terror y’all were OK by me.
Laura: Take good care of Dante. My leather jacket is on the back of my bedroom door and it’s all yours. And for god’s sake, please destroy all of my unpublished manuscripts.
Tracey: You can have all the stuff in my medicine cabinet. There’s real good stuff in there. In fact take whatever you want. I have a nice comforter. It is deliciously heavy and deliciously warm. You’re gonna love that thing~
Only thing that bums me out is that I won’t get to see the fireworks— won’t get to see the end of the world! Well, what can you do.
Anyway: Whoops!!! bye☆彡