I can think of maybe a dozen or so times when I blacked out, or should have died, or fell asleep thinking I was dying, or whatever . . . and I have wondered if that was when I broke off from the thing and woke up in this. Or maybe I have inherited the memories of my dead predecessor, and have continued living in his place. Did someone put me here or did I kill him? I don’t know. Maybe I am him, which is maybe the worst case scenario. I don’t want to be Ryan anymore. I really do want the whole thing to go away. I’m probably dead already. Wait! That’s definitely the worst case scenario, because I’m still somewhere, even if I don’t know where that somewhere is. Maybe I never knew. This has got to be a dream or else it’s hell. Is Hell a dream? Lord. For now I am trapped inside whoever I am wherever I am so I may as well suffer through it until either someone appears and explains the whole thing to me, or I go to the grave with the song still in me~