On Sundays I have a Secret Ritual at an Undisclosed Diner near my house. We go around noon or so and get huge dumb cups of coffee and have ourselves a good ol time. I’m working my way through all the vegetarian stuff on the menu. Today I had some wrap-ass thing with cream cheese. Man, it ruled.

My friend Matt claims that as I was paying my bill at the front, the woman behind at the cash register turned to him and made a face because I had said that people who drink malted milkshakes probably also like kettle corn—both of which are pretty gross. He said when I said that her eyes got big in a sort of “Are you really hanging out with this idiot?” way. I thought that was funny as hell.

Afterwards we all drove to San Francisco’s Japantown. We ran around and laughed like hell. In a place like that, what else can you really do with yourself? I looked at stuff, I scoffed at stuff, I loved some stuff a whole lot. There were also a lot of babes, OK~

Also: I bought a bunch of stickers. All right? If I regularly send you letters, hold onto your butts, because you’re gonna start seeing these little buddies on your envelopes:

Which one of you fools is getting that huge orange bear-thing? Or the red-cheeked raccoon? Check your mailbox and find out I guess!!