Yesterday at the grocery store (REWE ♥️) I noticed a strange package of pre-sliced cheese in the dairy aisle. I don’t even eat dairy but, as if sensing its phantom star-shaped presence, I turned to face it anyway:

For some reason people loved this and they let me know by pushing the little heart button on my Instagram story:

. . . and my German friends were quick to explain the origin of this little gnome child:

Brother McCune went so far as to label me as such:

I guess I can kind of see it:

Anyway YEAH: I guess this guy’s show is kind of like those old stop-motion Rudolph / Frosty the Snowman movies from the 60s that all American children watch at some point in their lives. Who knew! I guess I do now. There are worse shapes for cheese to take, and if this dude’s image entices children to get their calcium intake, then whatever. But I’m still not gonna eat it!!!