It was incredibly heartbreakingly stupid of me to leave my house in Oakland. I cannot undo it, either. I miss those two people so much. I am in a stupid city with no friends and have that godawful combination of being incredibly sad and incredibly broke, both of which feed into each other are yet are mutually exclusive sometimes as well.

What I should have done was pay my rent for the whole month of December and gone home for a few weeks. Then I could have come back to everything. And now Laura has moved out, and I have moved out, and our bedrooms are taken and there’s no going back to it. I moved away from my whole life. The life I have now is as empty as a god damn cicada shell.

My friends are in California. Being here is an astronomical waste of my time. What do I do???

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buds

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buddies

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