I wish I had never known a lot of people, especially people I knew for long periods of time, and who I liked a whole lot. Their absence makes my brain feel as though it is punched out, like a timecard, full of black holes and empty spaces. Man, it blows. I don’t want to think about them at all, and not because I don’t like them anymore, but because I still like them and miss being around them. I am mostly alone now, and so I can’t help but fall into it sometimes.
I promise I am not being dramatic when I say I have less and less than I did in previous years. Were I to, uh, create a graph of some sort, I could trace all the things I have lost, and how nothing else has come to take their place. I mean big huge important things, too! And not only that, but my self-imposed exile or quarantine from whatever else is going outside my house has warped me, or has at least led me further away from being able to relate to most people.
Uh oh! Oh well!!