23 May 2018

i realize this is a totally meaningless unsolicited opinion dispensed in a springing-out-of-a-trapdoor-in-the-ground sort of way, but whatever: what’s the deeeaaallll with this ‘always at the gym’ / ‘the world is my gym’ casual sportswear shit city-goers and yuppy-types alike wear? i walk around emeryville and all these motherfuckers got the same dumb nike shoes and dumb spandex-y pants on:

who are you kidding??? you’re at the bank, dude, or in line at a freakin taqueria. i don’t know. i realize they’re Just Clothes, though hell, look at those fucking clown shoes!

the reason i am so suspicious of this stuff is because, listen, as much as it hurts me to admit this: i go to the gym across the street from my house. all i do there is swim and use the stationary bikes. my weights are at home. i try to limit the amount of time i am in that building because i hate going there. it is such a weird universe. and listen: i’m watching you jerks!! when i’m on that bike . . . i see y’all walking around with your gym clothes and your little BPA-free water bottles and your snow-white towels slung over your shoulders, and you’re on your phones pretending to look exhausted, except you ain’t sweaty or anything. y’all ain’t working out. y’all just do laps around the building glad-handing employees and talking about GOD KNOWS WHAT with your fellow hitler-youth-haircut gym creeps. yeeeesssshhh.

this post was a little mean-spirited. i’m sorry. i’ll go away for now lol