Bout to fall the f*ck asleep in my tattered-ass grandpa cardigan

Catch y’all on the sunny side!!!

Every time I’m at the grocery store picking out apples, I always think, “Man, if there’s one thing I’m going to miss after I die, if the dead can be said to miss anything, it’s going to be apples.”

Wouldn’t it be so much easier if they didn’t look human? You know, the Empty Ones— the Feel Nothings! If they had lizard tails and scales and yellow eyes. Cold-blooded motherfuckers. Then we’d be able to avoid them. We could run away from them at first sight—or even do battle with them, right then and there! But no, they look just like us. What a god damn ripoff!

Man, it’s true: I don’t like anything

It was hilarious, all of it—especially that moon landing!

I’ve only seen my father cry a handful of times, and every time it was because one of our cats had died

Greatest god darn man to ever walk this cursed earth

REST IN PEACE MY BROTHER

Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming– “Wow! What a Ride!”

Yeah

HST was a cool guy