i made this

would you guys wear it

oops i bought a more & faster t-shirt

on the back it says RIP THE SYSTEM (lol)

watch t.v.

conform

obey

honor apathy

reward indifference

no thoughts

consume

do not question authority

doubt humanity

marry and reproduce

STAY ASLEEP

(lol)

uh. so i’m reading NO LONGER HUMAN (人間失格) and apparently osamu dazai drowned himself not long after he finished writing it

yumpin yesus!

well listen: i’m not going to spoil anything, but you read about three pages of this book and the fate of its creator is pretty much a dead giveaway, no pun intended

book rules a lot

it Speaks To Me, ok?? so does this picture of him

thanks dazai

bye

I took a low dose of acid and walked around Berkeley and Oakland for five hours. I reckon I probably walked about 10 miles altogether. As I got closer to home, I made a detour and passed by my old house on Marshall where I used to live with my friends Tracey and Laura, and where my friend Sam lives now. All the lights were on and so I knocked and my friend Katie answered and invited me up. I guess she’s cat-sitting Meeka for Sam. Anyway I drank a bunch of water and talked to her while she put a facemask on and then I went home.

i know where all the stray cats hang out and i go there and hang out with them too

sometimes i’ll try to get in touch with someone, and after two or three times of getting nothing but dead air in return, i just let it go and get on it with. and i’ll think: “i’m not going to contact that person anymore, because i feel stupid now, and i reckon i should just take a hint.” but then i’ll get drunk and sad, or whatever, and i’ll still want to reach out to them because i haven’t forgotten that i miss them

I am going to Austria in a month to spread my grandmother’s ashes. My passport expires in November, and I guess certain countries won’t let you use a passport that is set to expire within three months of your travel date, and one of those countries is Austria. So today I woke up and got a new one at UC Berkeley because for some reason they offer that service.

But before that I had to get my picture took. A guy at a photo shop in downtown Berkeley did it for me for $11. It took about five minutes. He handed me my pictures in a cute little envelope. I took them out and said, “Yeah. I look like a criminal.” We shook hands and I left.

See here:

Gross!!

At the UC Berkeley passport place, the woman behind the counter said verbatim:

“We was just sayin you look like a movie star vampire. You look like Twilight. You glide in here all smooth.”

I said: “Noooooo!!! Ugh, OK.” But perhaps I do glide . . . it’s more fun to glide than not.

The damn thing will be here in two weeks! Can you believe that? Last time I got a passport, all the way back in 2008, was at some shitty little post office outside of Baltimore. I needed it right quick because I was spending a whole month in Japan. My old picture is somehow even worse, only because my hair is like stupidly long and bad. Well, what the hell. I lived with that one for a decade, so I can live with this one too. And hopefully we’ll all be dead soon anyway so we won’t have to live with anything anymore, for good or ill.

(lol)

I’m home now. I slept all afternoon because I have residual strep symptoms and I hate myself and wish I were dead. So now I’m going to wander around Oakland and probably end up at Wolfhound, where I used to work, and hope to god my friends behind the bar take pity on my pitiful eyes! And maybe give me a free drink or two. Yeah.

Well: All hands bury the dead. Seeya later.