I saw ‘Blade Runner 2049’ opening night

and then I saw it again earlier in November

It’s real good. It sounds good and it looks good. It’s a cool thing.

They’re saying it failed miserably. And because it’s been out for nearly two months, it has begun to disappear from all the theaters in the Bay Area. So on Saturday night my junkyard brother McCune and I saw it again at AMC Bay Street in Emeryville. We smoked a joint outside and went in and sat in the second row. We were blasted out of our brains and ready to LIVE IN A NEON HELL for three hours.

I thought, you know, maybe this time everyone will just shut the hell up and watch this thing. I have talked to a lot of people who went and saw it, and have compiled multiple confirmed reports of the movie-goers there being huge dumb assholes. Like particularly so! Not an isolated incident! Or just me being overly sensitive because I like ‘Blade Runner’ and want to watch it! It’s insane. Previously I had heard people scoffing and laughing and god damn machine-gun farting during every quiet emotional not-funny scene. Every time I went I saw at least a dozen people exit the theater twenty minutes before the movie ended. What is this? What happened??

Everything seemed OK this time . . . and then some cheese-eating turd three rows behind us kept making this theatrically loud “PFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTT!!!” sound seemingly indiscriminately. Something innocuous would happen like . . . Ryan Gosling would be taking a shower, or drinking a cup of coffee, or his hologram girlfriend would be talking and he would go “PFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTT!!!” so that everyone could hear him. Oh, god! I wanted to lace up my starry black punching gloves and uppercut that human cockroach straight into space!!!!

I wanted to turn around and scream: “Why don’t you take a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut? Why don’t you take a flying fuck at the moooooooooooon?”

. . . but then of course I would be just as bad as him!






I am, as far as I know, not a Replicant. I am not an artificial human with no soul created and enslaved by my human masters to do menial tasks on Off-world colonies. But, uh, I can use my imagination and wonder what that might feel like, and then sympathize with the characters in the movie who are Replicants, and who do feel pain and sadness because they are unwanted and unloved???

I don’t know man!

Back in McCune’s truck, he said: “We don’t deserve movies anymore.” He was referring to the human race (lol). Yeah.

Anyway: I like that movie! I look forward to watching it alone in my own house soon. Good riddance, idiots!!!!!!